I don't really like people that much. I am an naturally introverted person and too much intraction makes me nervous at times. It's not a medical condition, its just a personal preference. When it comes to making friends, I like to think I seek out friendship due to similiar interests and disposition, so the intial idea of friendship for benefits seem like a cruel perversion. Who gets to know someone based on how they can use them to get where they want to be in life? The answer: Everyone. It's called Networking. Yes, I may be putting negative spin on it, but if you are an introvert you may feel the same way. forced connections for the sake of hob knobbing with the industry elite seems..well..wrong but it is the way of the world. In school, I'm sure your teachers and parents told you good grades gets you into good schools which gets you good jobs. Which is true, until all the other students that have good grades wants the job you want. Sometimes knowing who is making the hiring process is that tipping point of getting you employed. If you want to win, you have to know how to play the game. Capice?
1.Understand that everyone is a human being. It sounds so simple its stupid, but its true. Sometimes we can feel intimidated by people, or about the position that they hold. We don't want to sound foolish in front of them. But when you consider that they are a mere human mortal, capable of the same faults as you, they become more relatable and easier to talk to.
2. Have something to offer: You can't network if you don't have a usable skill. Take a long and honest assessment of yourself: What makes you interesting? What makes you marketable? What makes you special? Chances are, you have more than you think you do! Once you have confidence in yourself, other people can feel that vibe and also become confident in you.
3. Develop an Alter ego: No, seriously. All introverts need an alter ego for an appropriate time. Hell, give it a different name if you have to. Think about all the characteristics of someone who shines and apply that to the ego, this is forced multiple personality disorder practice. When i think of the alternative me, I shall call her "Ana", Ana is lively, funny, polished and professional. She is confident and is not afraid to laugh at herself therefore, no one can embarrass her. When she steps in front of a crowd, she is at ease and in control. Ana is pitching campaigns.
4. Practice: practice your alter ego. Look in the mirror, smile, talk to yourself, take note of your body language. Do you look like the type of person who is confident when you smile? Body language and tone is everything. You want to me memorable, not dismissed as someone who didn't care or didn't seem interested enough. And as an introvert, chances are your shyness has been read as snooty and aloofness. Don't miss out on an opportunity due to a misinterpretation of your wonderful introvert qualities.
5. Start small, start genuine: Public interaction takes some time to perfect. Take baby steps and try out your new alter ego. for example, go to the grocery store and randomly talk to someone who also happens to be looking at the same product as you. Give a compliment to someone who you feel looks nice, or has on a nice piece of clothing. However, it must be genuine. Don't force a commonality on someone. Don't tel someone you love his or her handbag if you really don't. Fakeness is hard to fake and is usually spotted. As you get more polished in talking to people, then you can fake the funk. With employers, sometimes it may be hard to find common ground but you are in the same field for a reason.
6. Know when to start and stop: oh, the dreaded "awkward silence" is a reason why I don't like people. Nothing worse then the forcing of a conversation that ended long ago! Knowing when to bow out will keep you from being uncomfortable, and will also keep someone from thinking you're weird.
These are just things that have helped me come out of my shell, even if it is for specific occasions. Of course, knowing how to talk to people isn't the only thing, its knowing who to talk to as well but that isn't something I can teach. I say, talk to everyone! You never know who will look out for you, or who you will make that connection with. If you are at an event, network with everyone from the janitor to the CEO, don't solely look at titles. Titles are temporary but that connection can and should be long lasting.
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