Scarificing Happiness and the Stress to be Great

I've always hated the word spoiled. I'm not particularly sure why, or where the deep rooted hatred came from, but the term has never sat well with me. Even as a girl, I would've like to think I've earned everything that I received. There is a particular sense of pride that comes with knowing you genuinely earned your prize and others acknowledging that hard work as well. But, I know that doesn't hold true for all. For some, the thrill of being cunning or privileged enough to get things easy trumps working hard every time. But in reality, I suppose average people like to meander somewhere between these two attitudes.

My collegiate career has been one of my personal shining moments. I strived and pushed to be in the position that I am today. It gives me great pride to know I have done something positive with myself, and it also makes me happy when other people realize it too. I love it when my parents and my husband give me praise for my achievements. I'm not flirting with professors to get my grades, this lil lady works her ass off and I deserve every grade I get. However, I always have to stop and ask myself is it worth it, especially in times of great stress. When I haven't had a decent nights rest in God knows how long, when my daughter hasn't had a book read to her in a week or so, when I'm too stress to even make love to my husband, and too eat a healthy meal, I know it is high time for an assessment.

Anything worth having is worth working for. My favorite motto is "to get something you never had, you have to do something you've never done". You must sacrifice. Often times you have to go without to get where you need to be in the future, but how do you know when you are sacrificing too much? At what point do "obstacles to overcome" transform into "signs to stop"? How do you balance that stress and your own personal happiness?

I always encounter a classmate that is striving to do the impossible while their happiness withers away. Sometimes that striving turns into accomplishing, sometimes it turns into failure, sometimes they turn out a better person sometimes they turn out bitter. It can go both ways; I know those who have graduated college, amidst various hardships and regret it and those who have dropped out and fine themselves happy about it. At this particular time, I know a classmate who is over stressed. In college and high school, there is so much competition to be this all American superstar. To get good grades, to join 20 clubs and be president of half, travel the world and speak different languages and ect.ect...blah blah blah. All of these things are wonderful to accomplish, but useless if you find yourself miserable while doing them.

Earlier, I mentioned that I always stop to ask myself is what I'm doing worth it.  Accomplishments for intrinsic value always push me harder and further than accomplishments for the sake of having a trophy. If sacrificing everything I hold near and dear is worth my goal, and that goal makes me that much more happier than I have my answer. And if I am miserable, boarder line depression than that tells me something as well. As I become older, I find my pride becoming less about what others think and more about me and that has caused me to do more and do things differently than what I would have before. After I question myself, I always stop to take in my current situation and what I am doing. If you don't stop to smell the roses, you never get to enjoy the blossoms that you planted. And that's..well..pointless.

The stress to be great and do great things is a wonderful tool. It teaches you that nothing is given to you, and that comfort creates contentment, but none of it is worth it if you find yourself no longer excited about the reward.